“Have you ever…been happy?”
I glanced at Anson. His expression was hopeful. I smiled. “When I was younger. My dad was a great guy. We were on the run so much but he still managed to be an amazing father. Those memories were the only things that kept me going for a long time.”
He reached out and touched my hand on the handlebar. “Happy you love…him. Anyone else…make you smile?”
“No. I’ve only been around other people long enough to get information and some rest before I left to be on my own.”
“Been in love?”
My feet slid off the pedals, and I jerked the bike before realizing what I was doing. Once I had control of the bike again, I peered at Anson. His eyes never left mine.
Had I ever been in love? No. I’d never given anyone the chance to get so close to me. Love? Nothing had made me ready to throw my life down for another person. I never had the need to wear a ring. Love made a person forget all logic. Love caused physical sensations. Love was trust.
No, I hadn’t experienced that, but as I watched Anson’s eyes light with curiosity, my heart skipped a beat, my stomach fluttered, my belly warmed. I didn’t want to ever reach the camp. I wanted us to stay together.
I forced my eyes back onto the road. “Been in love? I’m not sure that I’m capable of all that entails.”
“I’m capable. Give life for you. Most human thing…I can do. See you live.”
Something deep in my chest begged me to grasp on to him. The pressure inside of me released and I sighed. Anson’s blue eyes made me feel…alive. Comfortable. Like I was home. Complete.
Whatever this was, I couldn’t allow it to hold on to me. I’d fought for so long and now was not the time to stop. Relationships were dangerous. Death was inevitable. Anson’s was in progress. I’d built up so many barriers since I lost my father to keep my heart safe and somehow I’d let Anson inside. But I couldn’t keep him there. It would only lead to more pain.